Empty Nesters?

 

My last child moved out on July 1st.  He is 18 years old and now he is renting a room closer to the school he is attending. Our home is an hour drive west of Montreal so this will save him a ton of time.

Our oldest moved out last Fall and my daughter is hardly here at all.  She comes home for about 10 minutes every two weeks to pick stuff up from her room.

So my husband and I have crossed a milestone.  Empty Nester's?  Already?

I have no intention of taking down their rooms until I know for sure that all is working out well for them.  So many people tell me that they will come back as life is rough and they will fall on their faces eventually and need help.  I hate hearing this but I see all around me how this appears to be today's reality

It has felt like a whirlwind really.  Time just zips along when you are chasing kids. I have so much to clean up and get rid of. I have remnants of their childhood all over the house.  Why have I kept this stuff for so long? Funny thing is that they do not want it.  So I need to purge and make space for new life and new growth-my own!

People say that I must be sad.  I am not sad at all.  In speaking with the Grandparents the day that our son left, I explained that I am excited for all of them and for my husband and I. This seems to shock people as well.

Life should be constantly moving forward and evolving.

I think the key is to constantly have goals to work towards.

Now that we have completed the child rearing stage of our relationship, we can find each other again and remember why we started all of this fun 26 years ago.

We have individual goals and goals to work toward together. 

My intention from the very beginning was to get married and have kids.  I got married at 22 and everyone thought I was nuts!!!!  But that was what I wanted.  I stayed home to raise them the way I was raised.  Everyone thought I was crazy for that too! Now that the kids are all gone, people are telling me that this will not last.

When people are suggesting that I have it all wrong, I seem to be on the right track..ha,ha. So I am not worried.

My focus has been to raise them and send them on their way.  I have told this to everyone who will listen. I have achieved this.

What I say to folks whose kids are still living at home is the following- what was your intention going in? Maybe you have been saying all along that you want your kids to be with you forever?  Is that possible? Maybe you could not imagine your life without them so now you have want you have imagined?

We get what we put out...I believe this to be true.

Change your goals and make things happen. If you want your life to change, you must do something different.

Have a great day everyone.
Beth